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When the name Ru'in begins to leave Kiada's lips, Aurelia initially believes she is going to say Ryuu, one of her older children. Her heart jumps up her throat, nerves set alight by the possibility of her son being dead. But alas, it is Ru'in who has been given death, not Ryuu.
The mare begins apologizing, sorry she cannot answer Aurelia's question, but Aurelia just shakes her head side to side. "Don't worry about it," she began softly, a gentle expression kissing her porcelain face. "They could've died long ago, perhaps even before you were born. I've not seen many of my comrades in years." Kiada looked young, nearly too young to know any of Aurelia's friends. Aurelia could be triple- or even quadruple Kiada's age. The mare looked young and vibrant and healthy. Aurelia was still those things too, but she also wore time on her hollow bones.
Kiada continues, explaining that most of her friends and family crossed successfully, but that she was unsure if her twin or father made it. Aurelia watches forlornly as her company's gaze slips across the vast lake, perhaps out of sadness or perhaps out of a desire to change the topic. Aurelia ignores the social cues, unsure exactly what they mean and begins to speak, her voice humble and quiet, "I'm sorry for asking, I didn't realize what bringing it up may mean for you." Aurelia never apologizes. The simple admittance of a mistake may seem like no huge deal, but beneath face-value it truly is.
After a brief pause, she adds one more statement: "I had four children and carried a fifth within my belly before crossing over to the Rift," vocalizing her position pre-portal is not a tear-jerking thing to do, but as she continues she can feel the sadness creep up her spine and through her body. "Now I have no idea where the first four are. I don't know where my mate" or rather, ex-mate "is, nor do I really know anyone here." She felt isolated and alone.
In Helovia, Aurelia didn't have many friends nor allies. Usually, the pegasus mare was alone, but it'd been a different kind of isolation than now. In Helovia, her loneliness was a choice, one she made early on and never changed. In the Rift, her loneliness was forced upon her and she felt hopelessly unable to lift the feeling off of herself. What was the difference between the lonelinesses? In Helovia, she hated others and others hated her but she at least knew them and could communicate with them easily. In Helovia, the line between enemies and friends was often non-existent. In the Rift, she had no one, anything. In the Rift, she doesn't have allies nor enemies, friend nor foe, she has nothing here.
Amidst her thoughts, only one thing truly stands out above the rest. Helovia had been horrible to Aurelia, but compared to the Rift it had truly been heaven.
oh, tell me, what's the matter? |
Siren's Summit
