"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I shriek with the intensity of two badgers fucking. The sound of my utter distress is so raw it hurts my slenderly sloping throat as it rips out into the world, as destructive as a newborn child being birthed from a maiden mother. All the while I don't stop running, even though it'll make me sweaty. I'm frantic, gasping for air which is as tangled in my chest as the hair bouncing on my face. My heart is thunder; the only thing I can hear, a song as repetitive as Feliz Navidad. In order to escape I think about zig-zagging, so I dart between this tree and that, as graceful as a bloodhound puppy, given my circumstances. I can't keep myself from looking back over my shoulder, but as I turn to do so, I miss one of my 'that' s and plow directly into a tree. All the wind leaves me in a feeble croak, and my feet are knocked free of the ground by the momentous force of the impact - my cell phone goes flying too, jostled from the delicate grip in my mouth. I bounced off the rugged wood and stagger to the side, slouching into the rough bark of another tree, before finally collapsing to my side on the floor. The last thing I see is the subtle glow of my phone as it pulses with its welcome screen in the dirt a few feet from me. I mutter something incomprehensible and then the darkness of unconsciousness is all I know. |
Unenchanted item: cell phone
Otherwise do whatever to her!
What. The. FUCK!?